Divorce can be an extremely traumatic time for children. They have to adjust to the break-up of their family and not seeing one parent as often as the other, but also get used to new routines and perhaps a new home. Furthermore, your child may have witnessed traumatic behaviour, such as arguments, before you and your ex decided on divorce. As such, it is important that you make your child’s wellbeing a priority during your divorce to ensure that they come out the other end of it without any lasting emotional damage. Read on to find out how to support your child during divorce.

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1.    Consult a child law solicitor

A child law solicitor will be able to guide you and your ex through your divorce proceedings while placing your children at the centre of every decision. For instance, they can help you to put a legal agreement in place regarding regular visitation rights to the parent who does not have sole custody, as well as making financial arrangements regarding regular and sufficient child maintenance payments. Grant Stephens Family Law has trusted child law solicitors in Cardiff who can guide you and your ex through this difficult process.

2.    Shield your child from overt conflict

Divorce is an emotional time for everyone involved, and you and your ex may have experienced nasty arguments before making the decision to divorce. If your separation has turned hostile, try to shield your child from overt conflict as much as possible. Confrontation between parents can be frightening for children and make them feel anxious. Furthermore, never bad mouth your ex in front of your children, as this can be construed as manipulatively forcing them to pick sides. Remember that despite your problems as a couple, you are still the much-loved parents of your children.

3.    Talk to your child

You may think that your child is too young to understand divorce, and as such, the kindest thing is to remain silent; however, they will pick up on the overall atmosphere and change in routine and come up with their own explanation for what has happened. However, talking to your child about divorce can help to alleviate their anxiety. When you and your ex have made the decision to divorce, calmly explain the situation to your child in the language that they understand, without burdening them with unneeded information. Throughout the process, continue to ask your child how they are feeling and encourage them to ask questions. By doing this, you can reassure them that they are loved by both parents and that it is not their fault that you are getting divorced.

4.    Ensure regular contact with both parents

A large proportion of children of divorced parents live with their mothers. To ensure that your child maintains a strong relationship with both parents, ensure that they regularly see your ex. This might involve daily phone calls and regular visits and is reliant on a positive relationship being built between parents following divorce.